I don’t know if I’ve ever felt so apathetic about everything. I just feel like I have no motivation to do anything at all. I’ve been laying on the couch for the past few hours doing absolutely nothing but wasting time. I feel like that’s all I’ve been doing for weeks or longer. I’m just starting to get really sick of doing things just for it to backfire. I’m tired of things always going wrong and making a bad situation worse. I can barely take it anymore. I understand that nothing is ever going to come easy, but it’s getting to the point where I feel completely helpless. I just need a change which hasn’t come despite wishing for it every night for the past few years. Years of wishing and nothing. Absolutely nothing. It fucking sucks.